In my weaker moments i had let them see me cry. Caved under the fake stress sitting on my shoulders. Allowed the demons to do the talking, or something like that. Cotton mouth, Heavy limbs, Ideas i was too -- sick or drunk or sad or distracted to complete. I can't stomach the thought that some asshole might be right. I think i can taste blood in the back of my throat. I think i stay awake for another 24 hours i am going to start talking to trees. I keep forgetting to breathe..just for a second or 10.
1. Though my thoughts on this matter do have to do with you, they also just have always been what i told you sitting in my bathroom, Honestly. I couldn't/wouldn't and don't want too.
2. Your fucked up, Seriously your fucking crazy. And mean, Mean and Crazy. I don't like you. At all. Anymore.
3. gaaaaah droooooling.
4. I love you, I like being around you as often as i have been lately because i missed you an dim glad were still as close as we always have been 5 years later. Such a important part of my life.
5. I just cry about nothing sometimes and think it's because of you, but then when im sober i realize i just needed to cry because sometimes that's healthy? I don't care.
6. I ------- dont -------- get ---------- it (And i don't think about it.)
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IT'S SO NICE TO WAKE UP IN THE MORNING, ALL ALONE, AND NOT HAVE TO TELL SOMEBODY YOU LOVE THEM, WHEN YOU DON'T LOVE THEM, ANYMORE.
